Tuesday, 21 November 2017

MARILYN MANSON DEAD

Former ACDC bassist and white supremacist Marilyn Manson has died in his prison cell at the age of 83.

 

Saturday, 18 November 2017

MISS ISRAEL AND MISS IRAQ IN SELFIE ROW

There has been an outcry in Las Vegas following a selfie taken by two competitors in the Miss Universe competition: Miss Israel and Miss Iraq.


Friday, 17 November 2017

GEORGE TAKEI: I WAS RAPED BY CAPTAIN KIRK

In the latest sex sensation to rock Jollywood, Mr Sulu, whose only role to date, has been to play the character George Takei in various reality TV shows, has accused Captain Kirk of sexually molesting him as he tried to steer the USS Enterprise around a white dwarf.


Sunday, 5 November 2017

MARTIN LUTHAH KANG WAS A COMMUNIST

1960s Blactivist Martin Luthah Kang has been exposed as a Communist, according to the FBI dossiers on the JFK assassination opened by President McDonalds J Parp. The dossier also revealed Martin Luthah Kang's kang has been exposed to many hoes other than his biatch.





Friday, 3 November 2017

TOM CRUISE IN PAEDOPHILIA BESTIALITY SCANDAL

Tom Cruise is the latest celebrity to be exposed as being a right pervert, following allegations that he raped a puppy on the set of Cocktail.



A black labrador by the name of Sambo has come forward to reveal that Cruise sexually assaulted his great-grandfather, who can only be called Lucky for legal reasons, during the filming of the euphemistically titled film Cocktail.

Rumours about his sexuality have dogged Cruise all his career and his girlfriends have been hounded by the press as suspected beards. He certainly has not pawed them in the same way as in the revealing photo above.

Yet fellow Scientologist John Travolta claimed the press were "barking up the wrong tree", before dashing off to catch the last flying saucer to Aldebaran. However, Kevin Spacey, who was attending a showing of The Rocky Horror Picture Show with friend Noah Schnapp last night said Cruise was "a right dirty bastard" and that he was "not surprised".

As the dog was still only a puppy at the time, it is not known yet whether Cruise will be charged with bestiality or paedophilia.

Tuesday, 8 August 2017

JOOGLE SACK PRIVILEGED WHITE MALE

James Damore, an engineer at the company Joogle, has been sacked for 'perpetuating gender stereotypes', arguing that biology makes one gender better than another at some jobs.



Monday, 7 August 2017

KOREA TO NUKE USA

It is thought that North Korea is building a nuclear arsenal to attack American banks and needs to be invaded to be on the safe side.

Oh I do love to be beside the seaside.